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Lifesafer? by lanimalu Lifesafer? by lanimalu
D'oh, I've totally forgotten that I made this scribble. One good reason to upload it ... XD

Malik loves Altair, yes yes. :heart:
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:iconmustavisadi-12345678:
Altair can't swim because of a bug in the Animus 1.28. In Assassin's Creed 2, should you fall of the Acre Citadel walls into the water as Altair, you won't drown.
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:iconmustavisadi-12345678:
In the Animus 1.28,

Altair: Malik, what is that?
Malik: A punishment from Allah himself.
Altair: What punishment?
Malik: Sorry Altair, but you will have to swim without any floaties.
Altair: No, Malik, please no, please, no, no, no, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Malik: This is for my arm and my brother, Kadar!

Malik pops the floatie.

Altair: SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!
Altair: Help! Malik! I can't swim! Help me! Anybody!
Malik: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Altair: Help... Can't s-wim....... ca-n't swi-........ "glub" "glub".
Malik: Serves you right Altair. You were too damn proud!

In the Animus 2.03,

Altair: Why am I in a floatie? And what is that?
Malik: A punishment from Allah himself.
Altair: What punishment?
Malik: Sorry Altair, but you will have to swim without any floaties.
Altair: No, Malik, please no, please, no, no, no, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Malik: This is for my arm and my brother, Kadar!

Malik pops the floatie.

Altair: SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!
Malik: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Altair: Oops, the joke's on you.

Altair spashes water onto Malik's face.

Altair: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! In yo' face, dumbass!
Malik: What? How? When? How did you-
Altair: See ya later, suckaz! I'm gonna win me some Olympics! BYEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Malik: Novice!

Altair swims into the distance, not to be seen again until 1194.
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:iconsubject18-lyra:
subject18-lyra Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2015  Student Digital Artist
malik always mean to altair, poor him :(
Reply
:iconmustavisadi-12345678:
MustaviSAdi-12345678 Featured By Owner Jan 3, 2016
All because Altair's arrogance and Malik's jealousy led to the loss of his arm and his brother Kadar.
Reply
:iconchibinekostar2:
Chibinekostar2 Featured By Owner Edited Aug 3, 2015  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
 Malik: Altair, this is for your own good. Grump 

Altair: Ulp! O_o :( (Sad) 
Reply
:iconwhiteneko-chan:
WhiteNeko-Chan Featured By Owner Jul 30, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Me *sneaks up close with a camera* 

Altair : "MAlik, i didn't mean for you to lose your arm
Malik : Oh really *Inches pin closer*
Altair "It's true , please Malik, I'll do whatever you want if you just put the pin away"
Malik "Lets try no" *Pops Altair's lifesaver*
Me *takes tonnes of photos* *Runs away from Malik*
Reply
:iconblackhawkrecon:
BlackhawkRecon Featured By Owner Jul 18, 2015
Altair: M-Malik p-p-plea-please don't d-do th-this
Malik:*smirks evily*
Altair: I will destroy you
Malik: This is for my arm!
Altair: Nooo- gurgle gurgle
Reply
:iconthef3ralwolf:
TheF3ralWolf Featured By Owner Jul 16, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Altair just looks so.. distraught. XD
Reply
:iconfarahgerardway:
FarahGerardWay Featured By Owner May 2, 2015
The best part about Altair. He can't swim. XD
Reply
:iconmustavisadi-12345678:
Unless you reach the Animus 2.0 or later.
Reply
:icongcmirrorstar:
GCMirrorstar Featured By Owner Apr 25, 2015  Student Artist
Vinedows 7: "Don't you frikin do it Malik."

Malik: -Gets ready to pop it-

Vinedows 7 & Kat: "WE'RE WARNING YOU!"

Malik: -Inches needle closer-

Vinedows 7, Kat, & Sky: "MALIK, YOU'RE GONNA BE GROUNDED" >:
Reply
:iconpandanotes:
PandaNotes Featured By Owner Mar 28, 2015
Altair: "No...Malik....no...."

Malik: *Smirks.*

Altair: *Mutters silent prayer.*

Malik: *Pops it with pin.*

Altair: "Nooo...glug glug glug...."

****

Altair: *Wakes up screaming, soaked in sweat....* "But I...I died...didn't I....." *Looks around.* "It was a dream...." *Runs off and steals every pin and from Malik.* "It shall never become reality...."
Reply
:iconsniperhoof:
sniperhoof Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2015
Me: OR! You can stay out of the waters!
Reply
:iconmustavisadi-12345678:
Me: Or get a newer version of the Animus, dipshit!
Reply
:iconpandanotes:
PandaNotes Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2015
Altair: *Pouts and folds arms.*
Reply
:iconsniperhoof:
sniperhoof Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2015
Me: Yeah its the truth. U WOT M8?  (Foxy Chat Icon) 
Reply
:iconpandanotes:
PandaNotes Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2015
Altair: *Turns away, still pouting.* "Novice..."
Reply
:iconsilverthemystica:
SilverTheMystica Featured By Owner Feb 21, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
guess who gave malik the needle?
this guy...
Reply
:iconashencrystal:
AshenCrystal Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2015  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Altair: Malik n-
Malik: *pops the life preserver*
Altair: NOOOOO- oh? *his feet are touching the bottom and it's up to his neck* .......I hate you-
Reply
:iconmareyagogojoy:
mareyagogojoy Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2015
and no one ate dinner that night 0_0
Reply
:iconrukibunny:
rukibunny Featured By Owner Edited Dec 16, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
 Hehehehe Heart 
Reply
:iconstarlightyuki:
starlightyuki Featured By Owner Nov 18, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Altair: Malik don't even-

Malik:....* grins evil* hehe..*pops the life preserver*

Altair: MALIK!!!* flails around not realizing it not really that deep*
Reply
:iconowlwolfraven:
OwlWolfRaven Featured By Owner Oct 21, 2014   Digital Artist
*gasp* Don't. You. Dare. OnO
Reply
:iconghost889913ab:
Ghost889913ab Featured By Owner Oct 15, 2014  Student General Artist
P-please don't Malik! P-please? For me??
Reply
:iconlokiisdc:
LokiisDC Featured By Owner Oct 3, 2014
Don't Malik, please :'c 
Reply
:icondarxeeker:
Darxeeker Featured By Owner Aug 28, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Lol please don't, Malik! xD
Reply
:iconjasminyofemptiness:
JasminyOfEmptiness Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2014  Student General Artist
Facepalm 
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:iconchrimsonnaga:
ChrimsonNaga Featured By Owner Jul 20, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Poor ALtair can´t swim XD 
Reply
:iconmustavisadi-12345678:
Too bad it's a bug in the Animus 1.28 and was fixed in the Animus 2.0 and onwards. From the Animus 2.0 and onward, Altair can finally swim!
Reply
:iconstephanoooo12900:
StePhaNoOoO12900 Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Malik : *grins evilly*

Altair : don't do dis

Malik : this is for my arm novice *pops*

Altair : OH GOD N-GHKJFDFG
Reply
:iconflameheart10:
flameheart10 Featured By Owner May 27, 2014
Haha, love this! :heart:
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:iconvitaminanime:
vitaminanime Featured By Owner Apr 27, 2014
Probably having a panic attack in that water...
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:iconepicmanjack:
Epicmanjack Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2014
Altair:don't do dis
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:iconaltairandlier:
AltairandLier Featured By Owner Apr 18, 2014
this is so hilarious!!
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:iconbloodwolf752:
BloodWolf752 Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2014
I can almost imagine "Altair saying don't do it you-" *pops the ring* "-FUUUUCKER!!!"
Reply
:iconliliannaart:
LiliannaART Featured By Owner Dec 12, 2013
Malik : .... have fun Altair  :)
Cute Cute ;D
Reply
:iconiloveleft4dead2:
iloveleft4dead2 Featured By Owner Oct 23, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I WOULD BE TERRAFIDE THAT WATER LOOKS DEEP
Reply
:iconshewolf1234567:
Shewolf1234567 Featured By Owner Aug 6, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Will you people relax, he's obviously going to pop the float so he can save Altair himself
Reply
:icongraceless-queen:
Graceless-Queen Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013   General Artist
Malik you are a jerk, but I love you anyway.
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:iconmilouangel:
MilouAngel Featured By Owner Jul 5, 2013  Student Artist
lol XD [link]
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:iconfruitbatslyra:
fruitbatslyra Featured By Owner May 24, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Malik is so mean! :XD:
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:iconwhitelynx57:
WhiteLynx57 Featured By Owner Apr 17, 2013
Oh damn! Malik's in it for the revenge!! Altair's just sitting there going 'dear gods please no'.

And so, they never went on a swimming lesson ever again.
Reply
:iconistealurcandy:
iStealUrCandy Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
NUHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DX *saves altair before evil malik does the evil way* MY altair shall not be hurt ; n ;
Reply
:iconaelius-istora:
aelius-istora Featured By Owner Apr 9, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
oh cute. evil malik just realised he has a pin in his hand. hehehe. do it then save altiar
Reply
:icon505nochez:
505nochez Featured By Owner Mar 29, 2013   Artist
Malik you mother@#%$* idiot dont do it to the cutie pie altair
Reply
:iconnelski14:
Nelski14 Featured By Owner Feb 22, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
this will be....... interesting
Reply
:iconnoneedtoask:
NoNeedToAsk Featured By Owner Feb 11, 2013  Student Photographer
Don't do it Malik!!!
Reply
:iconbloodwolf752:
BloodWolf752 Featured By Owner May 16, 2013
*chants* do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it! do it!
Reply
:iconnoneedtoask:
NoNeedToAsk Featured By Owner May 16, 2013  Student Photographer
No! Don't! SWIM ALTAIR! Err-wait... XD
Reply
:iconsuka-retto:
Suka-Retto Featured By Owner Feb 9, 2013
Ahahaha! This is so adorable!

And the fact that Altair instantly dies the moment he touches water makes this hilarious. XD
Reply
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September 29, 2011
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